Monday, December 19, 2011

sweet and sour of life

The weekend went off..

Today was the final Monday in our semester 1 since next week will be our revision week (study week). There was a Monday blues as usual when every one came to class with laziness and sleepiness. Same goes to me. I felt so sleepy like I didn't sleep anymore at the night plus with the moody mode -_- We have been given our mid-term results and mine was just moderate. I've got band 4 (writing), 6 for reading as well as speaking. I definitely not satisfied with my own performance in writing! seriously it was like I do not improve anymore since I have learned English for months >.< Anyhow, every dark cloud has a silver lining. I still have chances to improve more before the final one which is will be on 29 Dis 2011.

Here is what had happened during the hectic weekend ;) . I've spent my weekend with my brothers, sisters and 5 naughty - hyperactive nephews. Also, 2 my sister in law's sibling who are very nice to me. We went to Melaka on Saturday to attend for wedding ceremony of my bro's friend. My first time to be in Melaka and the most thing that fascinated me is the mosque which situated nearby the sea. So serene and full of tranquility. The air are so fresh with very peaceful wind blowing slowly from the sea. What a wonderful scenery ! We prayed and rested there for a while before starting to travel around the city. Actually, we were came out with sudden plan which is going to Mahkota Parade Mall. Since it was a weekend so can u imagine how busy is it. Even the parking lot itself were full and after searching any empty parking for about half an hour, we managed to find it on the 8th floor. Yes, our cars were in the 8th floor !

It was quite hard to 'window shopping' with very hyperactive boys. They were always, run and run and it required us to be more alert about them. Yes, so tired handling with them but still it makes our travel meaningful :) I just bought a present for the class farewell party this Friday since there were one gift shop which have so many choice of gifts and the price also affordable. Late in the evening, we returned to KL and had our dinner at Sate Kajang. Well, well I ate as much as I can since this chance is only once in the blue moon! :D

Safely arrived at Ampang where we were stayed at night. There was nothing else I want to do except SLEEP. And, tomorrow our plan is going to Low Yat , early in the morning. >.<
Even the 2 days were full of out door activities and totally different with my routine every weekend (which is just stay at room and sleep ;p *study*) , I enjoyed the moment so much. At least it released my pressure and stress. Alhamdulillah.

Talking about the stress make me reminded of one thing which had been happened to me the day before the weekend. It was Friday when I have my pre-test for speaking. The test was going well. But, the news after that had broke my happiness. I accidentally asked the admin in Gombak about my course for the next sem, and I have been told by them that, my course (optometry) will not be open for new intake during the Feb intake (sem 2). Which means that even if I pass the EPT exam, I still have to wait until September to enter Kulliyyah. And, the saddest thing is, I have to register in Gombak again for next semester. Once I knew it, I felt like..Oh my God..what should I do... :'( *cry*

Up till now, the news still haunted my mind. Need to think what is the best solution. Maybe there is something else I can do, but still It was like disappointing and depressing :'(

Anyhow, I have to stay calm until I finish my exam. 10 days to go for the final exam. And hopefully I will not lose the spirit to keep struggling for my study. By hook or by crook, I have to enter the Kulliyyah and end my study successfully ! Only to Allah, we seek for help and May Allah show us to the right path...ameen.

The life is always full of sweetness and bitterness. Right?


Tuesday, December 13, 2011

hati dan mati

Hati yang mudah tersentuh bila melihat babak-babak sedih di depan mata. Hati juga senang untuk merasa sebak jika mengingatkan pada peristiwa-peristiwa lampau yang menyayat hati. Air mata pula tanpa segan silu mengalir bila melihat insan lain bersedih dan menangis. Apakah punca semua ini? hati wanita terlalu rapuhkah? atau sememangnya fitrah perempuan itu begitu?

Beberapa minggu yang lepas aku dikhabarkan dengan berita yang amat-amat menyentap hati. Berita sebuah kematian adalah satu berita yang menyedihkan, lebih-lebih lagi apabila terjadi kepada insan yang dekat dengan kita. Suami Madam (salah seorang guruku di UIA) meninggal dalam kemalangan jalan raya. Meninggalkan isteri dan anak-anak yang masih kecil, belum mengerti akan hakikat sebuah kematian. Madam sangat baik dengan kami, pelajar-pelajarnya dan beliau selalu bercerita tentang keluarganya, tentang suaminya. They are such a very happy family. Walaupun aku baru sahaja bertemu dengan Madam, tapi aku sangat kagum dengannya. Dia sangat tabah dan positif. Agak terkilan kerana disebabkan peristiwa itu, Madam akan bercuti lama dan kelas kami mendapat guru baru. Rindu sangat pada Madam. Semoga Allah permudahkan urusannya dalam meneruskan hidup bersama anak-anak. Ameen.

Bila terjadi peristiwa begini, bermacam-macam fikiran datang. Rasa pilu dan sebak sangat mengingatkan kehilangan tiba-tiba insan tersayang. Ditambah lagi dalam masa yang amat-amat kritikal-anak anak sedang membesar dan sebagainya. Tapi, sungguhpun apa sekali tanggapan kita, Allah itu Maha Mengetahui dan Maha Adil terhadap hamba-hambaNya. Pasti ada sesuatu yang lebih indah dalam perancanganNya bagi setiap musibah. Peringatan besar juga buat diri, yang mengingatkan bahawa mati itu pasti, dan tiba-tiba akan datang tanpa isyarat bila saatnya tiba. Semoga matiku mati yang baik, sebaik-baik pengakhiran..

Banyak sangat lagi impian dalam hidup yang belum betul-betul dapat aku kecapi. Sering tertanya-tanya, sempatkah? Wallahu'allam...indahnya hidup andai segalanya diserahkan bulat-bulat hanya pada Dia. Dapat atau tidak, hati tidak kecewa, malah bertambah-tambah rasa redha dan keimanan pada Nya. Subhanallah, indahnya jika hati ini seperti itu...<3

Harapan dan doa yang tidak akan pernah putus..


'A Blessing In Disguise'

Once I saw this idiom, I knew nothing what is the meaning. But, when my Sir explained it, I just smiled and undoubtedly, I love this quote :)

Meaning : A situation when it looks bad but actually in a way it is good for you.

I failed to finish my study in Medicine. Yet, I still have my chance to study 1/10 (maybe) about Medicine. I failed to be a doctor. Yet, I still believe that one day I will be a good Doctor.

I've never got exactly what I want in my life. Yet, Allah still give me the best, more than what I admired. Even, sometimes I felt this life is so unfair, I knew that every single thing happened with reasons. If the reasons is not yet revealed now, it will be soon, in the future.

Please heart, be thankful and grateful in whatever difficulties you face. Remember, you are never alone..